Thursday, January 28, 2010

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life which you have imagined..."

When I graduated from high school, I had a life plan.

This particular plan had been in existence since I was 12 years old. I remember the day that the beginnings of The Plan formed in my mind. I was in the lunch line at Pleasant Grove Jr. High with Jamie Norman getting our usual rolls and chocolate milk. For some reason at that moment I decided that when I FINALLY grew up (which was never going to happen, because I felt like I had been 12 years old forever) I was going to be a lawyer. I was going to argue in courtrooms and win cases and be brilliant all the time. I was going to buy all my clothes from Banana Republic. I was NEVER going to get married. I'd have a perfect, immaculate apartment in Boston and incredible friends. 

As I grew older parts of this plan changed. It formed into something that could fit on a 3x5 card:
Graduate from high school with enough credits so that I could...
Graduate from college before I...
Left on my mission and when I came home I would...
Go to law school somewhere fabulous like unto Yale or NYU. In my 2nd year of law school I could...
Fall in love. And in my 3rd year I would...
Get married. I would take the bar and practice for a few years and then I could...
Have kids. When my kids were grown up, I would...
Go back to practicing law full time. 

Life of bliss right? 

I thought so too. The Plan survived until the summer after my freshman year in college. And then when I came home from said mission, I changed my major. Twice. (Within the same field, don't you little worry. I went from being a History Teaching Major to a plain old History Major). I am 24 years old and am just getting ready to graduate from college in May. I have no idea exactly what I'm going to do when I graduate. I want to be a college professor, not a lawyer (though I still love me some Law and Order. I also love to visit my daddy's law office). The entire point of my telling you, blog world, this little story is that while my life may not be exactly what my 12 year old mind imagined (or my 18 year old mind, for that matter),it's wonderful all the same. An incredible and inspired friend told me this, "I just wanted to let you know that I know that Heavenly Father loves you. Sometimes his plans aren't the same as ours and we just have to trust him that he knows what he's doing and that he loves us and wants us to be happy. His plan is always infinitely better for us than our own plans, so even though it's hard to not know what is happening and to not understanding why it is (or isn't) happening, it's worth waiting and trusting in Him." 

So my dear blog friends, The Plan might have been revised a few times, but I am sure that I will be perfectly and incandescently happy... In fact, I'm already pretty darn pleased with life. 

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I like that you used incandescently in this post.:) Made me want my dear friends Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. Love it as always sister. :)

Jaimie said...

dear mal, do you remember when we did policy together and we had the tragic fate of going against those silly little bingham girls which resulted in me becoming a little emotional? he he, somehow i started thinking about that as you talked about law and stuff. thats all.

seagull lighitng fixtures said...

I love your blog!

Amanda Felix said...

Wow Mal, sometimes you sound just like me! Or I guess I sounded just like you... Anyway good luck with a History degree! I never knew you wanted to be a lawyer, history is a very good spring board into a law degree. Where do you want to do your Master's?

Erin said...

Mal, this reminded me of my old life plan, which included being a high school English teacher, getting married around 25, going on a mission, and yes, having lots of clothes from Banana Republic. None of those things have happened (though I do have SOME things from Banana), and I don't even care!

Are you so excited to graduate? Do you even know what you'll do with yourself? It's a crazy thing.

Liz said...

I LOVE LAW&ORDER TOOOOOOOOOO! this is why we're friends. we are so alike in so many ways. :) i remember the days when i thought i wanted to be a lawyer. maybe there's still a little reality in that? maybe we'll be lawyers on tv. we'll see...

Ann said...

Love your optimism! And thanks for the kind comment on my blog!

Unknown said...

Lish and I are going through the same thing, revamping our "plan." It always seems to work out better than we actually "plan" for it to. The Lord truly does know what we need better than we do. I hope all goes well. Maybe you could be a professor at a law school?! That could be cool! Anyway, I love you!

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