Monday, October 4, 2010

Menace to Society...

So. Last night I went home to good old PG for dinner because, during the school year, I don't really see my family all that often. I mean, sure, they only live forty-five minutes away, but I work on afternoon/evenings on Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Friday is insert current nerd obsession here night with Megan and during the fall Saturday = football. Because of church stuff my Monday nights are also gone. Anyway, you get the picture. Since I got off work a little early last night due to a massive headache (apparently I looked like I was on least according to my student) I decided to pop a couple of Excedrine and drive myself on down there. While eating dinner with my family the subject of my glaringly single status came up. I, feeling slightly uncomfortable with the topic, made some joke about being past all hope of getting married. I mean, come on. I'm 25 (Please note the HEAVY sarcasm) and I managed to live in Provo for 3 years without becoming eternally attached to anyone. That, my dears, is a feat of sideshow proportions. Lucky for me, I made a couple of jokes at my own expense and then the subject was dropped. I didn't really think too much about it again until I read a blog this morning where a newly married girl of 22 began to whine about how she was turning 23 soon and what is a 23 year old to do?! Apparently, according to her, when you're 23 you're supposed to have babies.
Lots of them.
I began to laugh to myself.
 At 23, I was: 
managing an apartment complex, taking 14 credits at school, going dancing with my roommates on the weekend, helping Chels plan her wedding, buying clothes all too often and staying up all night watching movies.
Please do not read this as a bitter diatribe of a single girl who, in Mormon culture, has reached the level of spinster. It's not. Trust me. I could give you one, but I'm not bitter so it would mostly be about stupid people and the dumb things they say to me. (My new favorite, said by a girl in my ward is perpetually unhappy about life: "Have you ever even BEEN in a relationship?" Is there something odious about me that would send of vibes that I've never been in a relationship? Honestly!)
The more I thought about that particular blog post, the happier I became with my current life situation. Don't get me wrong, if Captain Kirk were to come along and sweep into the Enterprise to fly off in the glow of a supernova (silly, they don't have sunsets in space),
you wouldn't hear a word of complaint from this girl. 
But as that has not happened, I simply refuse to waste my time.
I'm not going to pretend that I don't have crappy days where I listen to sappy music and cry a little wondering what's wrong with me. I do (though I don't really care for crying. It tends to give me a headache), but it's a lamesauce waste of my precious, valuable and freaking awesome time to freak like that on a regular basis.
So behold, a list of things that I will accomplish in my life:

-Eat a bagel on the lower east side of New York City
-Stand at the top of the Eiffel Tower
-Read Pride and Prejudice while walking through the English countryside
-See a Broadway show
-Graduate from college
-Take the GRE
-Get a master's degree
-Make a quilt all by my lonesome without having to bother my mother to help me
-Get another paper published
-Milk a cow
-Ride in a hot air balloon
-Swim in the Pacific Ocean off the coast of Hawaii
That's all I'm willing to share currently, lest you steal all of my ideas and do them before I can. 


Amy said...

Dear Mal, I love you. Love, me.

PS May I travel with you? These trips sound delightful. All of them.

Kim said...

Ummm... who is this 23-year-old? Please! I think the happiest people (and most pleasant to be around) are those who are grateful for what they have and where they are right now... people like you!

By the way, I would love to swim off the coast of Hawaii with you. Anytime. You name it. Milking a cow... you're on your own there!

Malinda said...

HA! Well I still love you! And as one who has almost reached the age of seven and twenty...the dreaded age of Austen's spinster, Miss Anne quite happy to live, how ever distantly in your single company!

...will you actually be walking in the English countryside as you read P&P? Because that is quite the multitasking!

Baby Sister said...

I love that list!! You are awesome. :)

Annette said...

I like your list :) And I have to laugh at that 23-year-old who wants lots of babies. I love my girls. I really do. But sometimes it sure would be nice to go dancing on the weekends, plan a friends wedding, stay up late and watch movies without worrying about waking up the kids, and have all sorts of fun. I'm sure glad you're enjoying it!

Jordan and Chelsie Toone said...

You were an angel in helping me plan my wedding and dancing on the weekends was a blast! Don't forget the daily Gilmore Girls episode and Quesadillas duriing lunch! Love you!

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