Letters to no one...

Dear new cafe here in the business school, 

 Chicken noodle, minestrone, tomato basil, potato leak and veggie are all types of soups. What's that you say? Chili is missing? No. No, it's not. Because chili is not a soup. PUHLEASE learn the difference and quick. It's cold and I want soup.

Sincerely,
  A soup-less and slightly grouchy administrative assistant

Dear Union, 
  Thanks for having a chicken Caesar salad for me.  And for giving me the chance to run into Tracey. It made the freezing cold walk back to the b school worth it.

Love, 
  A FINALLY sated girl

Dearest, darlingest Diet Coke,
  You and me, baby. Furrrrever.

All my love, 
  A girl that would marry you if it were socially acceptable

 Dear snow, 
 I know that you and I have had a love-hate relationship since my return from sunny Southern California nearly four years ago, but (and don't take this the wrong way) could you hurry up and make an appearance around these parts? It's not that I actually want you around; what with all the slushing up my drive to work and constantly putting me in mortal danger when I leave the safety of my house to do something so simple as a run to the grocery store; but I live in this thing called a desert and we kinda need you in order to make it though the summer.

Impatiently yours, 
The short girl who hates it when you get her pants wet but is willing to sacrifice for the good of the many


Dear Tuesday, 
I appreciate the time and energy that you've put forward to be more awesome than Monday. Just know that you efforts have been noted and are greatly appreciated.

Cordially yours,
A fellow Monday hater

Now don't get all bent out of shape...

Ugh. Can I please express the utter displeasure that I experienced this morning when I was unceremoniously yanked from my bed at the disgusting hour of 7 am to find 4 inches of snow outside my window?
(I'm allowed to complain about the weather, I'm from Utah.) I'm completely over this whole snow thing. Don't send bad vibes my way, Amanda. It can snow in Pleasant Grove all it wants so long as it rains in Salt Lake, okay? Here's the list of reasons why snow and I should only have contact on a very limited basis:

-I'm short, so my pants drag on the ground unless I wear heels which isn't a good idea because...

-I'm clumsy. Case in point, this morning I slipped on ice and planted myself on the front lawn. I was wet for hours.

-I throughly loath driving in the white stuff. It's slippery and icy and scary.

-I don't think that I look  so great in hats, so I rarely wear them which means that the snow ruins my hair.

-I absolutely hate when my feet are cold. No matter what kind of shoes I wear, my feet are always cold when it snows.

-Frozen mascara? So hard to put on.

-While the clothes are darling, I hate being hot under my jacket while my extremities are freezing.

I have a feeling that a move to warmer climates is definitely in order.

Oh the weather outside is frightful...

Cliche? Maybe. Honest? Completely. I was almost blown over in the Target parking lot today whilst running my pre-storm errands. (You don't think that coconut chap stick is a pre-storm necessity? Then you're not me. No judging me on my own blog. It's the number one rule of being my friend.) 

Anyway.

We've been hearing for days that Armageddon is the form of a massive snow storm is going to hit Utah this afternoon and tonight. Apparently it's going to be epic and horrible. They actually went as far as to issue a blizzard warning. I remember the last time they issued a blizzard warning. I was 18. It was the day after Christmas. My dad drove me from Pleasant Grove all the way up to Salt Lake to work and then had to turn around and pick me up again because they closed the store. There were snow piles as tall as me on the streets. (I'm not, by any means, insinuating that I am tall. I'm a midget by most people standards, I'm just trying to give you a visual.) I love me some snow, but am petrified of huge storms. The idea of being stuck in the house? No power? No where to go? So not my idea of fun, unless I had a really handsome guy to cuddle with me and make me hot cocoa. But I don't have that.These are the moments where I lament the fact that the Bewitched nose wiggle doesn't actually produce anything. Also, that apparation doesn't actually exist. It would be delightful to just pop myself home for Thanksgiving so I didn't have to worry about driving in the snow. But since wishing doesn't really get me far, for now I have mint M&Ms and Oceans' 11. And 12. And 13.

And a stack of Christmas cards to make. Ya'll should get excited because, let's be honest, I'm going to get cabin fever in like 4 seconds once this wall of snow hits Salt Lake and that makes me punchy. 

This, my friends, is my new favorite winter song... let me know what you think.
I want a snowfall kind of love
The kind of love that quiets the world
I want a snowfall kind of love
Cause I'm a snowfall kind of girl

I want a snowfall kind of love
That lights up the sky from below
I want a snowfall kind of love
That brings people to their window

Won't you bury me in your quiet love?
Oh bury me in your quiet love
Oh bury me in your quiet love
And we will blow away

I want a snowfall kind of love
The kind of love that keeps you in bed all day
Oh I want to look through with you
And watch it all melt away

Won't you bury me in your quiet love?
Oh bury me in your quiet love
Oh bury me in your quiet love
And we will blow away

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year...

It's no secret that I adore fall. It's also no secret that I adore snow. Yes, you can blame me for praying for it on a regular basis as soon as November 1st hits. I'm sorry, but it's the truth. Don't hate me. Anyway, as I was driving to work this afternoon I was flipping through the radio channels and FM100 has already started playing Christmas music (which I'm morally opposed to. I am my father's daughter through and through on this one. No Christmas until after Thanksgiving) and heard the end of my all-time, most favorite, played-on-repeat-all-season-long Christmas song: I'll Be Home For Christmas. And even though I detest listening to Christmas music before Thanksgiving, I let it play. It was snowing and I was all warm and stuggley in my car (feeling perfectly safe driving thanks to my new tires and my wonderful daddy) and I remembered once again how much I love this time of year. I love that I have an excuse to go home a lot to do things like make candy with my mom or for family Christmas parties. I love that EVERY time I go home my whole house smells like cinnamon. I love that finals are almost here and that means the semester is almost over. Basically the ONLY downside to all this is that is ends too fast. So here's the the start of my very favorite time of the year....

A few things I'll never understand Part 3... (ie the University of Utah edition)

*That when I got out of my car this morning on campus, the girl that got out of the car next to me was wearing a mini skirt...in the snow. Granted she was wearing tights, but still! I looked like the Stay-Puffed Marshmallow Man reincarnated and she looked like a super model. At least I was warm.

*That leads me to my next point. SNOW. In October. Don't get me wrong. I adore snow. I pray for it. But at least let me enjoy fall before you start to slush up the road and freeze me out. I need time to gear up for it.

*How when I'm taking notes in class and I'm not sure of the spelling, I sometimes expect a little red line to appear underneath the word, signifying that it's been spelled incorrectly. I blame this on being a product of the computer age.

*Why anyone would actually CHOOSE to smoke outside (I don't get why anyone would choose to smoke, inside or out either). I know it's the law and everything, but it's about 32 degrees outside. That cannot be pleasurable.

*Those annoying people who walk around campus and hand you stupid flyers about things like naked acapella (true story, I saw a flyer for it on Harvard campus when I was in high school) or a protest against vegans (that one I made up). No one really wants them. Don't waste your time out in the cold.

*Why afore mentioned people needed to be in the library yesterday, insisting on handing me stupid little cards about making $15 an hour when you know full well that there's a catch.

*In continuing with this particular part of my rant, I don't understand why the library floor on the 3rd story of the library must be made out of polished marble. As you well know, when polished marble is wet, it's slickery. This combined with my desire to get away from the annoying card handing out people and my no traction shoes lead me to slip and fall in front of the entire library. As a result, I have a bruise on my left knee the size of an orange. It's gross.

And last but not least,

*Why the boys that are currently studying anatomy behind me can't keep their voices down while attempting to memorize that parts of the prostate. I'm not even joking.